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some christian teenagers at the mall tried to tell me that Jesus feeding the crowd with fish and bread was just like using admin commands in minecraft to make more food and now I'm a protestant

@vriska I'm curious about the line you're drawing between "christian" and "protestant," but this is otherwise really funny

@DialMforMara i refused to let evangelicals be in the same grouping as catholics

@vriska ah. Which of those are you calling "christian"? I ask because I was Jewish at a high school that was mostly Protestant and overwhelmingly evangelical, but also had a few Catholic families, and none of those doctrinal distinctions were meaningful because they all hated me.

@DialMforMara they're all christian but I still don't want to put evangelical TV preacher types in the same group as catholics. also fuck them kids.

@DialMforMara evangelical protestant stuff is about jesus and hating other people who arent like you and making money. Catholicism is about hating yourself and aesthetic

antisemitism, taxonomy of christianity, my high school trauma 

antisemitism, taxonomy of christianity, my high school trauma 

@vriska Mary can DM God to give you a good word but she won't ask for any admin commands to be used to help you unless you're Catholic

@vriska I'm a Christian and this was hillarious. (I know a evangelical couple who run a LGBT+ rights organization in a major city. Most people identifying as evangelical are bigots and/or cultists of one TV preacher or another, but some actually take Jesus seriously)

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